“Uncle Vernon” Himself, Richard Griffiths, Dies

Richard Griffiths

Richard Griffiths, seated, met aspiring actor/director/writer Brian DiMaio, right, on the set of the second Naked Gun film. DiMaio, a bit too focused on the camera as he performed his bit part pushing a samovar of coffee across the room, ran the cart into Griffith. The coffee landed in Griffith’s lap setting off a chain of events so hilarious that it made the final cut of the movie.

London—Richard Griffiths, longtime theater and film actor, has died. He was 65.

His agent, Simon Beresford, confirmed Griffiths died Thursday from complications following heart surgery earlier in the week.

Griffiths, best known as Harry Potter’s mean, materialistic Uncle Vernon, got his start on BBC Radio and in small theatres in England.

Besides appearing in five of the “Harry Potter” films, he also appeared in “The Naked Gun 2 ½: The Smell of Fear,” “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy,” “RECOiL” and “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides.”
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“Doogie Howser, MD” Coming To A Theatre Near You

Doogie Howser, M.D. The Movie

Doogie Howser, M.D. The Movie will bring together old cast members and new.

Los Angeles—Twentieth Century Fox announced yesterday that filmmaker and producer Brian Robbins has been chosen to write and direct a big screen adaptation of the 1980s ABC Network TV show, “Doogie Howser, MD.” Robbins has previously directed “Good Burger” and has produced or co-produced several television series, including “Smallville” and “Keenan and Kel” on Nickelodeon. Robbins himself starred as leather-clad greaser Eric in a sitcom on ABC in the 1980s, “Head of the Class.”

“Doogie,” about a 16 year-old genius medical doctor, aired for three seasons on ABC from 1989-1993 and helped launch Neil Patrick Harris’ acting career. It is not yet known if Harris, who currently stars as Barney Stinson on the CBS sitcom, “How I Met Your Mother,” will have any association with the film.
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Another Studio Trying To Cash In On Success Of “Harry Potter” Franchise

MGM Market Research

The Daily Quarterly has acquired this alleged market research questionaire.

By: Fred DiMaio

London—A source close to the British office of Hollywood’s MGM Studios has not denied that “a woman from the village of Hydesmythe-on-Thames might or mightn’t have been signed by the studio to write a series of books, likely in the neighborhood of seven or eight.” According to the source, who is NOT a producer-type, “one year after we make a movie based on some kid who comes from a dysfunctional family and who goes on great adventures to save the world, she will write a best-selling book.” 

While the process seems a bit cumbersome, perhaps even backwards, the source explained, “those folks who signed that Rowling bird started this whole mess. We are blooming well trying to catch up with all the money they got from the movie rights BEFORE anyone can scoop this writer out from under us. Don’t matter to us if the bloody book itself doesn’t sell, as long as kiddies go bonkers over the movie, merchandise, video games and toys. Have you any clue how much quid they’ve raked in over those ‘Potter’ books?”
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TDQ Investigates: Who Would Win, Yoda Or Dumbledore?

Yoda Vs Dumbledore

Dumbledore, all powerful wizard (left), squares off against Yoda, Jedi Master (right) in what would surely be worth $30 to $50 on Pay-Per-View

We know what you’re thinking: You idiots, one of them died a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, and the other died in June 1997.  We know, we know. But just bear with us as we debate this notion that we totally stole from our buddy, Justin Camputaro, who posed this very question recently on Twitter.

Now, for our purposes we’re using Dumbledore as a representative of wizards as a whole. The argument could also have been made using any famous wizard, be it Merlin or Gandalf or Kwame Brown. And we’re using Yoda to represent all Jedi Masters, though arguably he’s the most powerful Jedi Knight. The argument for who would win, Darth Vader or Voldemort, is for another day.
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Hanna-Barbera To Begin Production On Harry Potter Animated Series

Hanna-Barbera presents Harry Potter

Hanna-Barbera presents Harry Potter

Burbank, CA—In a deal nearly five years in the making, cartoon production company giant Hanna-Barbera announced yesterday that they had finally reached an agreement to produce seven 13-episode seasons telling the entire saga of “Harry Potter.”

“We’re thrilled,” said Zeke Barbera, spokesman for the studio. “We’re very excited that this deal was finally struck after a lot of hard work by a lot of people. We can’t wait to start drawing and casting voices.”
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