TDQ Investigates: Busting Young MC’s “Bust A Move”

Young MC

This MTV trading card depicts a young Young MC and harkens back to a time when MTV was still into music and there were trading cards for everything!

In this latest installment of deciphering and tearing apart horribly-written “songs,” we hop in our time machine and dissect Young MC’s chart topping hit, “Bust A Move.”

Take a few minutes to remember the catchy beat about young, jobless, carless men trying to charm their way into the um, hearts, of attractive young ladies. Then let’s examine some of the awful lyrics in this thing.

The first verse speaks of the typical jobless young chap who somehow finds the wherewithal to attend a party one night, then somehow makes his way into a “high class luncheon” the following day. He ends the first verse imploring the chap, who is clearly taking advantage of free food at the affair, to dance with the available young ladies despite having just over-eaten.

After stealing a lyric from a hit from the early 80s, “Lookin’ for love in all the wrong places,” Mr. MC muses on a form of suicide I’ve certainly never read about or heard of in any other song:

No fine girls just ugly faces
Some frustration first inclination
Is to become a monk and leave the situation
But every dark tunnel has a light of hope
So don’t hang yourself with a celibate rope

The end of the second verse discusses meeting a young lady in a movie theater, clearly a precursor to an Alanis Morissette tune…

Your movie’s showin’, so you’re goin’
Could care less about the five you’re blowin’
Theater gets dark just to start the show
Then ya spot a fine woman sittin’ in your row
She’s dressed in yellow, she says “Hello,
Come sit next to me you fine fellow.”
You run over there without a second to lose
And what comes next hey bust a move

How in the world would he know she was dressed in yellow if the lights had gone down? Please.

Verse 4 brings us this gem:

Your best friend Harry has a brother Larry
In five days from now he’s gonna marry
He’s hopin you can make it there if you can
Cause in the ceremony you’ll be the best man

Why is he the best man in the brother of his best friend’s wedding? Doesn’t his best friend’s brother have a best friend? Could his best friend, who is the brother of the man getting married, be the best man in the wedding? And these problems say nothing to the issue of parents who name their sons Harry and Larry. That’s almost as bad as naming your two sons Walker and Texas Ranger. Ridiculous.

Maybe Harry or Larry could give our unemployed friend a job, and then he could rise above the timeless truth Young MC describes thusly:

Girls are fakin goodness sakin
They want a man who brings home the bacon
Got no money and you got no car
Then you got no woman and there you are

But until that happens, sadly, there’s no way to know when the poor young man in the song will be able to “bust a move.” Sad indeed.

You are now informed. Go and do likewise.

Young MC, Grammy Award Winner

Let us not forget that Young MC won the Grammy award in 1990 for Best Rap Performance! Now let us temper that enthusiasm by reminding our dear readers that was the same year Milli Vanilli won for Best New Artist.

Gentle Giant Bond Villain Richard Kiel Dies At 74

Richard Kiel

Richard Kiel, right, with RECOiL writer/director Brian DiMaio, left. Keil’s scenes from RECOiL were, regrettably, deleted because it was discovered too late that his head was cropped out of frame in most of his scenes.

Fresno, CA—He survived being left in space by James Bond and getting a nail shot in his head by Happy Gilmore, but 7 foot 2 actor Richard Kiel died last week in a Fresno hospital at the age of 74. The cause of death hasn’t yet been determined.

Born with acromegaly, Kiel mad a name for himself playing huge characters both on TV and in films. He was best known as the henchman Jaws in two James Bond films, “The Spy Who Loved Me” and “Moonraker.”

He also appeared in the films “Happy Gilmore,” “The Longest Yard,” “RECOiL” and “Silver Streak.”

On the small screen, he played the title character in “The Paul Bunyan Show” and “Lassie.” He also tried to *SPOILER ALERT* cook the entire world’s population in the classic “Twilight Zone” episode, “To Serve Man.”

He is survived by his wife of 40 years, Diane Rogers Kiel, sons Richard, Bennett and Christopher; one daughter, Jennifer; and six grandchildren. Continue reading

“One Month You Could Be Playing A Doe-Eyed Intern, And The Next You Could Be Playing A Masked Ninja Warrior:” A TDQ Q&A With Actress Kaleina Cordova

Kaleina Cordova

Kaleina Cordova

This week’s TDQ Q&A features up and coming Kaleina Cordova. Kaleina spoke to us about her roles in “The Glades” and “Step Up Revolution,” the difference between Florida and LA and learning from every acting job she gets. Here is this week’s TDQ Q&A with actress Kaleina Cordova: 

The Daily Quarterly: Who was your favorite actress growing up?

Kaleina Cordova: I grew up in the 90s and one of my favorite shows was “The Amanda Show” on Nickelodeon. So I would have to say Amanda Bynes.

TDQ: What was your favorite A&E Network cop show growing up?

KC: Actually I’m only now just beginning to watch cop shows and crime dramas. I was more of a comedy enthusiast growing up!

TDQ: What made you want to be in show business?

KC: I used to visit my dad on set as a kid, and after a while of observing and soaking it all in, I realized I wanted to be in front of the camera. I had my first role in a movie when I was 10, and I’ve had the acting bug ever since.

TDQ: What’s the best advice you’ve ever gotten?

KC: To not be afraid of responsibility but only accept what you can handle. Sometimes when great things come your way, you believe you can handle them all. But you always need to step back and put things into perspective.

TDQ: What’s the worst advice you’ve ever gotten?

KC: “Let’s just take a shortcut!” We were hiking and my friend decided he knew of a better way down… It was an hour of sliding on my butt down a narrow steep hill, clinging to branches and shrubs. Bottom line, never take a “shortcut.” Continue reading

Fashion Critic, Comic Icon Joan Rivers Dies At 81

Joan Rivers, seated poses for a picture on the set of  The Late Show Starring Joan Rivers with RECOiL writer/director Brian DiMaio, standing second from left, and other minor celebrities.  DiMaio was a regular guest as he had been banned from the other late night talk shows for various reasons he is not at liberty to discuss.

Joan Rivers, seated poses for a picture on the set of The Late Show Starring Joan Rivers with RECOiL writer/director Brian DiMaio, standing second from left, and other minor celebrities. DiMaio was a regular guest on River’s late night show as he had been banned from the other late night talk shows for various reasons he is not at liberty to discuss.

New York— Pioneering comedienne and fashion critic alongside her daughter, Joan Rivers died Thursday after complications arose and she suffered a cardiac arrest during a surgical procedure last week. She was 81.

Rivers’ stand-up career took off after appearing on “The Tonight Show” in 1965. Paving the way for an entire generation of female comedians, she quickly became a protege of Johnny Carson, and was one of his favorite guests and his fill-in host before a rift formed in the 1980s when Rivers got her own talk show.

Besides television and stage work, Rivers also appeared in films like, “The Muppets Take Manhattan,” “Iron Man 3,” “RECOiL” and “Spaceballs.”

She won an Emmy Award for her daytime talk show in 1990. She received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in 1989.

She is survived by her only child, Melissa.

“I Will Be Playing Prince Vito Of House Corleone. He’s Known As ‘The Red Sauce,’ And Wields A Poison-Tipped Ice Pick:” A TDQ Q&A With Actor Chris Caldovino

Chris Caldovino

Chris Caldovino

The Daily Quarterly: Who was your favorite actor growing up?

Chris Caldovino: Robert De Niro

TDQ: What was your favorite HBO original TV show growing up?

CC: “The Larry Sanders Show.” So ahead of it’s time!

TDQ: What made you want to be in show business?

CC: Well, its something I always wanted to do, but didn’t think it was an option when I was growing up. I took some acting classes in NY. Then, one of my best friends, who is a screenwriter, decided to move to Hollywood to pursue his career. I decided to join him and give it a go. And, here we are!

TDQ: What’s the best advice you’ve ever gotten?

CC: I was just starting out, and was at an audition waiting to go in. I hadn’t gotten my lines down yet, so I was nervously going over my script. An older guy sitting next to me looked at me and said, “Kid, if you didn’t bring it, you ain’t gonna find it here!”

TDQ: What’s the worst advice you’ve ever gotten?

CC: Can’t really remember. If I did get bad advice, hopefully I didn’t follow it.

TDQ: Who are your influences?

CC: De Niro, Brando, Pacino, Montgomery Clift, Robert Duvall, Daniel Day Lewis, Harvey Kietel, James Gandolfini, Gleason, Cary Grant, Abbot & Costello. I could go on!

TDQ: Besides working on HBO’s “Boardwalk Empire,” you also appeared on “The Sopranos.” What is the best thing about working on an HBO series?

CC: Well, it kind of has the old studio system feel (the good parts of it anyway). It gives you a feeling of community and being part of something great. Also, you get to work with the best of the best.

Chris Caldovino is Prince Vito

Chris Caldovino is Prince Vito “The Red Sauce” of the House of Corleone in Game Of Thrones, Season 5.

TDQ: Since this will be the last season of “Boardwalk Empire,” what are the odds you can parlay your experience at HBO into a gig on “Game of Thrones?” Can we go with an exclusive?

CC: Okay, okay, you got it out of me! Yes, you can go with an exclusive. I will be playing Prince Vito of House Corleone. He’s known as “The Red Sauce,” and wields a poison-tipped ice pick.

TDQ: What other projects do you have lined up?

CC: I just completed a TV pilot called “Dirty Dead Con Men,” which is presently being shopped around to the networks. Also, I’m starring in, and producing a film called “The Nigerian” shooting in Cleveland this summer. Continue reading