Amanda Bynes To Play Taylor Swift In Upcoming Bio Pic

White Horse

Amanda Bynes is Taylor Swift in White Horse: The Taylor Swift Story.

New York—Despite a recent string of bizarre tweets, photos and arrests, things aren’t all bad for twice-retired-unretired actress Amanda Bynes. Sources confirmed yesterday that the former star of “The Amanda Show” has just been cast as Taylor Swift in an upcoming bio pic of the famous country star.

The film, tentatively titled “White Horse,” is set to begin filming this fall in Nashville and Vancouver, which will double as Swift’s hometown in Pennsylvania.

“Crazy excited, yl’all (sic)” Bynes tweeted last night when her reps confirmed the casting. “Gonna shoe (sic) the haters they can all suck it when I get my oscar 4 this movie!!!”

Bynes went on to compare her upcoming performance to also-recently-in-trouble-with-the-law actress Reese Witherspoon, who won an Academy Award for her portrayal of June Carter Cash in “Walk the Line.” “If Rese (sic) can win a (sic) oscar for playing a music lady, you beter (sic) believe I sure as hell can!”

It is unclear how much involvement Swift herself will have with the film, but some sources said they aren’t ruling out a cameo, maybe “as Carrie Underwood or something crazy meta like that!”
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Warner Brothers Announces Live-Action “SilverHawks” Movie

SilverHawks: The Movie

Producers hope the cast, packed with star power, will make up for the obscurity of the SilverHawks franchise.

Los Angeles—Warner Brothers announced yesterday that they’re bringing yet another 80s cartoon to the big screen with a live-action adaptation of “SilverHawks,” which revolved around a team of human police officers in the 29thcentury who have metal bodies and hawk wings and fight to stop organized crime in the Galaxy of Limbo.

Jon Favreau has been signed to both write and direct the film, which the studio is hoping will be the first of a trilogy.

“We know the original run only lasted one season,” said a spokesman for Warner Brothers, “but that just tells us there are many, many more stories to tell. We’re delighted that Mr. Favreau is at the helm of this project with this great cast we’ve put together.” Continue reading

Taylor Swift Just Biding Her Time Until New Boyfriend Pisses Her Off And She Gets A Hit Song Out Of It

Taylor Swift

Some sources are speculating Swift is dating her “Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax” costar The Lorax. The two have been seen together on numerous occasions.

Nashville, TN—Sources close to country music star Taylor Swift have confirmed rumors that her new relationship is going along very smoothly, and that Swift is laying low, waiting for when her new beau does something heinous and selfish so she can get another hit song out of his heartless actions.

The sources wouldn’t confirm who the newest love of Swift’s life is, only that it’s not Tim Tebow, that Swift and her man have been dating “pretty seriously” since early April and that he treats her like a princess.

And there’s the rub. “Unless he cheats on her, or dumps her unceremoniously or goes all Tiger Woods on her,” said one source, “Taylor has a tough time being able to write another ‘bad boyfriend’ song. Don’t get me wrong, she’s happy now, and that’s great and all, but she does have a career to think about.”
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