Man Hospitalized After Fight With Co-Worker Over Proper Way To Consume Krabby Patty Candy

Krabby Patty Violence

There’s no wrong way to eat a Reeses, but Krabby Patties are a different story.

Valparaiso, IN—A man was hospitalized with second-degree burns to his torso and legs after a co-worker threw a coffee pot at his chest after an argument escalated between the two over the proper way to eat Krabby Patty candy.

Dale Torsanko had brought the remaining bag of the candy, which his wife had bought for Halloween, into his office at Indiana Farm Bureau Insurance. He knew the candy was a favorite of his co-worker, Gina Berk, according to the police report prepared by the Valparaiso Police Department.

After some good-natured banter back and forth about the candy, Berk told Torsanko he was eating it incorrectly.

“He kept eating it like a real hamburger,” the report quoted Berk as telling police. “I told him he was doing it wrong, that he needed to eat it in layers. It’s not a real sandwich, he wasn’t eating it right. He just wouldn’t listen.”
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Oscar-Winning Helicopter Pilot Ernest Borgnine Dies At 95

Ernest Borgnine

Fresh off his role in 1990’s action flick “Laser Mission” Ernest Borgnine, right, was cast in RECOiL to play the part of a seasoned helicopter co-pilot along side actor/camera man Glen Vitale, left, who played the role of hot-shot cop Eddie Simmons. Unfortunately the character Eddie was killed in the early minutes of the film and his later scenes with Borgnine had to be removed as they presented major continuity problems for the editors.

Los Angeles—Actor Ernest Borgnine, who won an Academy Award for the 1955 film, “Marty,” died Sunday. He was 95.

He started his career on the stage in the play “State of the Union” in 1947. He landed his first Broadway role two years later in “Harvey.” He transitioned into film and got his first film role in 1953’s “From Here to Eternity.”

Besides winning an Oscar for “Marty,” Borgnine also appeared in such films as “The Poseidon Adventure,” “Escape From New York,” “RECOiL” and “The Dirty Dozen.”

Borgnine found even more success starring on ABC in the sitcom “McHale’s Navy” from 1962 to 1966. He returned to television in the 1980s playing helicopter pilot Dominic Santini in “Airwolf.” He also voiced the retired superhero character Mermaidman on “SpongeBob SquarePants.”
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