Poll: American Flag Pins Prove Citizenship

American Flag Pins

With American flag pins effectively implying citizenship they have become a hot commodity on the black market.

Washington, DC—In a recent non-scientific poll, 86% of Americans who responded said they believe that anyone wearing one of those little American flag pins is “in all likelihood” a natural born citizen of the U.S.

When also asked about the citizenship of President Obama, 95% of that 86% believe the President was not born in the U.S., with 79% responding he was most likely born in the “nation of Africa.”

“I’ve never seen Osama [Obama] wearin’ an American flag pin,” stated John Bithlo, 54, of Columbus, Texas. “And nobody I know has ever seen him wearing one. Tell me, why do you think that is?? I’ll tell you why, it ‘cuz he tweren’t born here!!”

When asked about the President’s recent certification as a naturalized citizen of the United States of America by the State of Arizona, Mr. Bithlo responded “Arizona?? Arizona? Are you serious? Ain’t nothin’ but Mexicans out there. Takin’ over the entire state!”

Maricopa County (AZ) Sheriff Joe Arpaio, the self-proclaimed toughest sheriff in America, responded to the poll by saying “Ya, I reckon an American flag pin is pretty good proof. Better than one a ‘dem computer generated print-outs from the ‘state’ of Hawaii.” [air quotes his]

“But let me say this: You go out there and you find me a Mexican wearin’ an American flag pin, by dern,” Arpaio said, “and I’ll find ya that there, whatta ya call it, the, the chupacabra they keep talking about! They both don’t exist!!”

The poll was conducted by CBN News, with a margin of error of +/- 3%.

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